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"You've got to be taught
To hate and fear,
You've got to be taught
From year to year,
It's got to be drummed
In your dear little ear
You've got to be carefully taught.

You've got to be taught to be afraid
Of people whose eyes are oddly made,
And people whose skin is a diff'rent shade,
You've got to be carefully taught.

You've got to be taught before it's too late,
Before you are six or seven or eight,
To hate all the people your relatives hate,
You've got to be carefully taught!"

- Lieutenant Cable, South Pacific; music by Rogers & Hammerstein

In my youth, I wasn't afraid of anything. Not heights, or bugs, or strangers. The world was my oyster, and despite a few broken bones, it seemed it would stay that way. But innocence is not forever. I don't know when it happened, or how long the change took, but eventually I began to be afraid, perpetually cautious in my surroundings. I worry about falling every time I walk down some stairs, I'm freaked out by snakes, and most significantly, I felt trepidation when I encountered homeless and high risk individuals in Edmonton. Don't be misled by the quote above; I wouldn't identify my feelings as hate, more an distrustful nervousness. As I said, I don't know how these feelings came to be. Many people rationalize it as self preservation, but I have never personally had a negative experience with someone that I would have identified as homeless; I have no personal reason to be afraid. The musical I quoted above tells that racism is something which we learn from those around us: our families, our peers, and the media. I think this applies to the homeless, and to the racial associations we make with that group of people. It is a lesson I wish I had not learned. I wish I could go back to my childhood and walk the map I created for this class, one which encourages the walker to forget their presumptions and look around at the people who really call this city home. I wish had the ability to record my thoughts as a 7 year old walking that map to preserve those prejudice-free thoughts.

    In past years, I have worked on changing my views, and I think I've succeeded to a greater extent. I no longer feel fear downtown for the most part and I don't find myself profiling people based on preconceived notions. Some people who I have discussed this issue with think that I'm naive, that my apparent bravado will surely get me into trouble. Personally though, I would rather go through life without fear and judgment bubbling just below the surface, and view the world with the clear eyes of youth.

(P.S. South Pacific is a great musical, I recommend you see it. But don't watch the movie unless you have a lot of time and patience. And Red Bull. Basically, I recommend a live version.)